Ducks, Dryers and 2013: GIF In Review

Hey everyone and welcome to post #23 of the blog. Obviously it’s been a while since the last blog, so this might get a little more ranty than usual, but who knows. This past month has been crazy busy as usual. Yes, I know I say I’m pretty busy every time I write the blog so I doubt it even carries are weight at this point, but still. Which by the way, if you want to preserve some shred of your shattered ego after just getting your ass kicked in an argument just say “yeah but still.” Give it a try, I mean don’t get in arguments with people that are clearly smarter than you are, but try it out. Anyway, after two months in the making, here it is: the new blog!!

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Oh and by the way before I start, even though I know it’s a bit late I want to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year, heck I even got you something. Hope you like it!

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Truth be told I love everybody who takes time to read the blog but a GIF of Stone Cold Steve Austin giving the finger is just too good to pass up. You’re Welcome!

The first thing I need to complain about because everybody seems to have an opinion on it now is Duck Dynasty’s own Phil Robertson making some comments in a magazine article about how he doesn’t understand and doesn’t condone the gay lifestyle because it goes against the Bible. Then he was put on “indefinite hiatus” (which basically means hey you’re fired but you’re also making us more money than a dentist at a redneck convention so technically you’re just off TV) by A&E after they issued the standard “we’ve always been supportive of the LGBTA people etc etc.” Since then basically everyone across the country has come out in support of Robertson or A&E either deeming Robertson “hateful” or saying A&E violated Robertson’s rights. Both of which are B.S. by the way, A&E was perfectly within their right to put Robertson on hiatus, and nothing about what Robertson said was hateful. I could (and probably would upon request) write a thesis paper on why both sides of this argument are just pointless and that people are just whining, but I won’t.  I’m honestly not even to going to get into what I think of what he said because it’s irrelevant. But I mean do we seriously not have any more fuckin problems? World hunger, the Middle East, Tyler Perry movies? Those are all gone? It’s his opinion, he’s entitled to have one, just like we all are. That’s honestly the worst part of this whole retarded hobo crusade that everyone’s on is this thought police B.S. Look, he has a belief that’s different than yours, get over it. He’s not advocating violence or physical harm, so what’s your beef? And the other side of this is in some respects equally as dumb. Quite simply, he’s an employee of A&E, he pissed off the powers that be and so he’s off TV. He hasn’t been fired, he hasn’t been harmed in any way I’d argue. I didn’t agree with what A&E did either but the guy is worth $400 million, I think he’ll be fine. The whole thing is just a giant crapshoot, and I mean considering Uganda just passed a law which makes homosexuality a punishable offense, I’d say we’re in the upper tier when it comes to our overall gay tolerance, despite all the whining we have to listen to from every LGBTA group. Oh, and now A&E removed him from hiatus, which basically means now everyone hates them instead of just the pro-Robertson people from before. Great work!

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Yeah it’s going to be one of those blogs.

Like many of you, I was one of the poors saps that put all of my Christmas shopping until December 23rd, which I guess overall wasn’t bad except for two big gripes I have, not even so much with Christmas shopping itself as with tolerating people who have the IQ of Kim Kardashian.

go-dar-30

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So one of the things on my Mom’s Christmas List was a new hair dryer, so I decided to get that. Never in a million years would have I thought it would be so goddamn difficult. So my brother and I are sitting there in Target looking at different ones while having no idea what the difference is between turbo dry, super dry, ionic dry, dry&style and whatever else there was. So I’m sitting there on my phone which has no reception because we’re in the back of fucking Target trying to look up reviews while he sticks his head out of the aisle like a GI sticking his head out of a foxhole in Vietnam looking for an employee. Ladies, I’ll be the first one to admit that by and large you’re smarter than we are, not at everything mind you but a fair amount of things, so why do you put up with this?!? Just to prove a point I went to look at men’s electric razors after I finally picked out a blowdryer and they were all clearly labeled with what each one did. Sensitive skin one is here, beard trimmer one is here, contoured chin one is here and etc. So why do blow dryers not work like this? Anyone? Because here’s the best part, some people will say this blow dryer burned their hair and some people say it wasn’t hot enough, it’s just……excuse me I need to yell for a moment…

WHEN YOU DECIDE TO USE WEIRDLY BROAD TERMS WHEN SELLING A PRODUCT IT MEANS NOBODY FUCKING KNOWS WHAT THEY’RE BUYING! THE ONLY THING WORSE THAN CHICKS NOT KNOWING WHAT IT MEANS IS DUDES TRYING TO BUY IT FOR A CHICK AND CRAWLING INTO THE FETAL POSITION BECAUSE THEY DON’T KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN “TURBO” AND “SUPER”. IMAGINE IF SUPERMAN AND TURBOMAN GOT INTO A FIGHT, WHO WOULD WIN?!? NOBODY FUCKING KNOWS BECAUSE WE DON’T KNOW IF TURBO IS BETTER OR WORSE THAN SUPER. IF ONE LADY BITCHES THAT HER HAIR IS BURNED AND A DIFFERENT LADY BITCHES HER HAIR IS STILL WET AFTER USING THE EXACT SAME PRODUCT IT MEANS YOU’RE MARKETING TEAM DOESN’T KNOW WHAT IN GOD’S NAME THEY’RE DOING.

Other than that I have no opinion.

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Seeing as how it’s the end of the year, I think it would be fitting to pay a little homage to 2013, and what better way to do that than to look back at all the best GIF’s that have graced this blog over the past  year. I know right? Brilliant.  So without further adieu, I present a very special 2013: GIF (…or JPEG I guess) in Review!!

ebCpNeminem keep it real

st6lg

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Random Thoughts:

  • I just realized yesterday that it’s called “Downton Abbey” not “Downtown Abbey”. What the hell?
  • Speaking of which, am I the only one that sees the irony in taxpayer funded public television playing mostly shows made in the U.K.
  • When writing an online review of a product, a little grammar and spelling goes a long way, or at least makes you look like less of an idiot. Someone spelled great Ggreeat on one of the blowdryer reviews I was reading. Are we still wondering why the Chinese are beating us?
  • It’s 2013, why is “Bad Day” by Daniel Powter still being played anywhere on TV?
  • Got Assassins Creed IV for Christmas and it’s absolutely fantastic. Perfect example of a bunch of little things making a great game.
  • Don’t get the new android software update. Just bad. Normally I don’t give a damn about phone stuff but this is just bad news.
  • If I had a dime for every fucking time somebody gets on their high horse about being used to the cold because they’re Minnesotan I’d have enough money to fly to Florida.
  • I might be a little biased, but I’d say that 2013: GIF In Review is one of the best sections I’ve ever had in this blog. Oh you don’t think so?

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That’s all for now. The Disney song of the week is Prince Ali from Aladdin and of course there’s also the cute GIF of the week! Thanks for reading and as always questions, comments, and likes on facebook (they feed my fragile ego!!) are welcome!

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About Steve

My thoughts from the week. Includes amusing commentary on life and various ramblings on any number of topics. Trust me, you'll enjoy it. View all posts by Steve

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